Monday, June 18, 2012

Profile Adjusted

I took some thinking about what I felt I should place in a profile that was not boring to myself. In general, as mentioned in a previous post, I find most profiles boring. So I went to go look at some random profiles in a try to discover why I think those profiles are not doing anything for me.

I came to the conclusion that most profiles are simply a list of clichés and platitudes. How often do you read someone writing in their profile: "I am here to have fun". Well, I'm pretty sure that is true! I'm also pretty sure that it is true for everyone that spends their free time online. Otherwise they would not spend it there. So a better approach would be to write there what kind of fun you like then.

Then there are some that try to make their profile more meaningful and indeed write what they think is fun: "I love to spend time with my friends".  Grrrrrr... of course you do! But... the most likely thing that will happen if someone reads that is that they think: "Ohhhh she likes to spend time with friends. I guess, since I'm not in that elite group, that she's not into meeting new people". Well done: Your friendly and seemingly interesting remark backfires even before you talk with someone.

It's these kind of things that I read in 90% of the profiles that make me roll my eyes and sometimes simply make me feel like giving up reading profiles at all. When you keep something like this in mind it's not that hard to come up with some truly interesting things instead of all the standard cliches. Yet, even if you have a list of honest likes and dislikes, there's always only a very small percentage of it that is interesting to a random reader. Besides... a list is not a profile.

A profile should be a mix of likes and dislikes in combination with some of your characteristics. I deliberately have chosen to make my new profile a bit different than usual. It's not saying much about me directly. It says more about a lot of the others. As such it places me outside the biggest group of people anyway. So here it comes in almost the max 500 characters I am allowed to use there:
List of nonsense:
- I'm here to meet people and have fun
Duh! Why would I logon otherwise?
- I'm an intelligent and nice woman
Would I have said it if I was not? Probably yes (got you thinking now?)
- I hate drama
Pfft! Those claiming to do so are often drama queens. Bring it on!
Thank you for making it all the way down this list of clichés. By now you should realise that I can not be fitted in this box. Instead talk with me and you might actually hear something useful about me!
I have had more people contacting me than usual the last weekend. The reaction I loved most:
<Nice girl>: Hi Kylara, I have to say that I really enjoyed reading your profile. I notice I have to adjust mine though.

We talked a bit about it and she truly asked me interesting questions. I did the same to her and... I have someone on my friendlist that I would never have contacted because of her (for me) boring profile. She read mine and was luckily not insulted by it.

Another funny comment that made me change my profile text quickly:
<Original Guy>: I read your profile and I had to laugh about it. Want to bet though that I can fit you in a box?
I laughed together with him and told him I would adjust something right away.
I changed it quickly from "I can not be fitted in a box" to "I can not be fitted in this box":

I guess it's working for me and will not change it for now. Those being insulted by it are only insulted because they have been caught writing silly things. If they choose to be insulted instead of thinking about it seriously, they are not worth my time anyway.


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